Friday, September 02, 2005

Still Waiting For The Green Light

Lately, I have felt as if I were forced to wait indefinitely in a grown-up game of "Red Light - Green Light". The light seems to perpetually be on red, and I am waiting for someone to call out "Green Light!"

Rabbi Tzvi Freeman, explaining a teaching of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, clearly described this state of being in an article entitled "Prison Juice":

The worst prison is when G-d locks you up. He doesn't need guards or cells or stone walls. He simply decides that, at this point in life, although you have talent, you will not find a way to express it. Although you have wisdom, there is nobody who will listen. Although you have a soul, there is nowhere for it to shine.

And you scream, "Is this why you sent a soul into this world? For such futility?"

That is when He gets the tastiest essence of your juice squeezed out from you.

While Rabbi Freeman's thoughts are incredibly insightful, I am still left with more questions than answers. I am still at the red light, waiting. I am still at the red light crying out the words from the morning blessings, "Blessed are You, Hashem, our G-d, King of the Universe, Who releases the bound."

This posting continues a thread left off here and here.


At September 2, 2005 at 10:38:00 AM EDT, Blogger MC Aryeh said...

I am waiting at the same light. Just when you feel you are not capable of crying out anymore is exactly when you most need to...

At September 2, 2005 at 10:54:00 AM EDT, Blogger A Simple Jew said...

Thanks MCAryeh. We are in the same boat. At least I am not alone.

At September 2, 2005 at 1:33:00 PM EDT, Blogger Akiva said...

It's a very hard moment of faith. I just finished a similar time, after months of concern, davening, kevrei tzaddikim, throwing my hands in the air, and crying out "what do you want, I cannot solve this, and the circumstances put me (and my family) where you clearly don't want people to be", the door opened, the problems vanished, were solved, were resolved, all in 2 days.

It's not fun, the relief is palpable, but you learn something along the way. What you can do, what you can take, emunah under pressure is not the same.

At September 2, 2005 at 1:36:00 PM EDT, Blogger A Simple Jew said...

Akiva: I greatly appreciate your comments...more than you know. Thank you.

At September 3, 2005 at 4:47:00 PM EDT, Blogger Alice said...


Did that help?

: )


At September 4, 2005 at 6:11:00 AM EDT, Blogger A Simple Jew said...

Thanks, Alice!


At September 4, 2005 at 8:42:00 PM EDT, Blogger alice said...

I've been going through this too, most of this year. I wonder if the green light comes on when you stop looking at it (like the saying "a watched pot never boils")?

(A different Alice!)

At September 5, 2005 at 1:25:00 AM EDT, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Some say"that the more you accept that everything that happened in the past was for the best, then the happier you will be". Also not to think about the future but to accept the present as it is. Chazak OOvaruch.

At September 5, 2005 at 2:56:00 PM EDT, Blogger Jen said...

My problem is that there are too many green lights right now. Which one should I drive through? You mean I should drive through them all? But how?


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