I Often See Examples Of This
Excerpt from 1-2-3 Magic by Thomas W. Phelan, Ph.D:
Recently I was in a grocery store standing in front of the dairy case. As I was trying to decide what kind of milk to buy, I noticed a mother with a girl, about nine, pushing a cart and coming around the corner toward me. As they came closer, the mother said anxiously, "Now watch out for that man over there!"
I'm an average-sized adult male of about 180 pounds. There is no way this young lady was not going to see me. Even if she had been traveling at 40 miles per hour, she still would have plenty of room to stop before crashing into my legs. Mom's comment was an example of what we some times call "overparenting". Overparenting refers to unnecessary corrective, cautionary or disciplinary comments made by parents to kids. These parental comments can be unnecessary for several reasons.
1. The child already has the skill to manage the situation.
2. Even if the child doesn't have all the necessary skills to manage the situation, it would be preferable for the youngster to learn by direct experience.
3. In addition to 1 or 2, the issue involved is trivial.
Though the incident we just described is trivial, the issue of overparenting is not - for two reasons: (1) parents who overparent usually do it repeatedly, and (2) overparenting has predictable, negative effects on children. Kids will have several reactions to unnecessary parental warnings and unnecessary discipline, and none of these will be positive. Add these reactions up over time, and you have a significant negative impact on a child's personality and self-esteem.
Related: Parent Hacks