Three Friends - Then & Now [Part II]
Last week I got together with one of my friends for a cup of coffee during lunchtime. My friend was once a professional musician and now he earns his livelihood as a bureaucrat scrutinizing contracts for eight hours a day.
Our discussion centered around finding a creative outlet for our talents. I asked him if he ever had desire to return to the music business since it was apparent that this was still his true love. He replied that he wasn't yet ready to do so. He then asked me what my creative outlet was and I side-stepped the question with a non-answer. My mind raced and tried to determine whether I should tell him about my blog. I quickly decided against it, remembering the stories of others who had also regretted doing so.
As I walked back to my office, I started thinking about what this reluctance said about our friendship. Two of my current friends have absolutely no clue about my blog, while the other friend that I have never met in person only knows me through the words I write in my postings and e-mails to him.
I then reflected on these words that I wrote in a posting in November 2004:
When we are dealing with blogs, we are dealing with neshomas.
We can not see the person who blogs. We can not hear them.
We can only read their words. Words that come from within them; expressing who they really are.
I would say that my quality of friendship with my friend who I had coffee with is exceptionally strong. While we have discussed many very personal topics that I have addressed in my postings, I still have never revealed to him the existence of my blog; the inner sanctum of my thoughts. Does this fact reveal that our friendship is deficient in some manner? Or does the deficiency in friendship lie with my friend who only knows me through my blog but has never met me face to face? On one hand we have a person who only sees me for less than an hour once a week but communicates with me on an exceptionally deep level, while on the other hand we have a person who never sees me but communicates with me almost every single day on an equally deep level.
Perhaps the real truth lies within the words of Rebbe Yitzchak Meir Alter of Ger, who once said, "There are only two who truly know you: G-d and your spouse."